This Christmas was the first one with TBF and the first one without Rebecca. =/  I knew it was the beginning of the end when Vanessa moved.  I figured then that I had limited time with my children because they were growing up and moving away from mommy; however, I didn’t realize how quickly things would snowball.  I didn’t know Rebecca wasn’t coming down until we went to pick up the kids from the ex on Christmas Eve.  We got there and Rebecca’s boyfriend was with them.  TBF got out of the car to help Ethan load his Guitar Hero World Tour that his dad got him and Rebecca said, “Uh…I’m not coming.”  I was stunned.  It never crossed my mind that she wouldn’t come down.  I cried on and off a little on the way home, but finally excepted it and enjoyed the rest of the holiday.

Ethan got Guitar Hero World Tour from his dad and Vanessa got an ipod touch.  From me, Vanessa asked for all clothes and (other than World Tour) Ethan only wanted a year subscription to XBox live and a black controller.  TBF got him the controller…and Vanessa a purse (which she asked for).  I was ugly.  I wrapped everything Ethan got (including a shirt and a book) except the XBox live card which I put in the very bottom of his stocking.  He wasn’t going to say anything, but he sure wasn’t smiling while opening his presents.  He was looking for that Live card…lol

TBF and I decided not to get each other anything.  He’d brought me home heated/vibrating slippers and I had bought him a shirt before Christmas.  Of course I still got him stocking stuffers and the kids gave him stuff for his ipod touch.

The day after Christmas, I woke to Vanessa singing and Ethan playing drums.  TBF said, “This is going to get old fast.” and boy he was right.  Vanessa stuck to Slow Ride with the last Guitar Hero.  This time, it’s The Joker.  I’ve caught myself singing, “Some people call me the space cowboy…” and I cringe. =/

Ethan’s best friend that lives in Austin called.  “If my mom brings me down, can I stay with you guys for a while?”  so I’ve got an extra kid living with me for the moment…and the mouthy little punk kid from up the street has been here since Christmas too.  He’s over so much now that TBF and I have started getting on to him for his bad manners and making him talk politely.  I don’t think we can make up for his lack of parenting at this point though.  The best we can do is make sure he knows what’s okay to say at my house and what’s not.

I must be insane.  What was I thinking going to SHOP at WM the weekend before Christmas?  I know what I was thinking, “You still haven’t found that movie for the girl at work who’s name you drew!”.  I know better than to procrastinate that long, but I did it anyway. 

You had to be either really lucky or Evil Knievel just to nab a parking space.  I’m not that lucky so after almost getting hit not once, but twice by people that were pulling in the wrong way to park in a parking space while a car was backing out, I actually waited to park in the back of the parking lot. 

I had a mental list I’d been reviewing of what all I still needed to get, but it got lost in mind - replaced by the chattering of my teeth as I hiked from the parking lot to the store.  I got lucky though.  The store was warm AND I got one of the remaining 5 carts.  As if that weren’t enough, the cart worked without squeeking, dragging, or limping! 

As I defrosted, I began rethinking my list and remembered most of it.  First, the movie “Lucky Number Slevin” for the girl at work.  I went to one of the two scariest parts of the store for Christmas - Electronics.   I’m not sure if it or Toys is the scariest…one has people whining, screaming, and throwing fits….and so does the other.  At least with toys, I can give the kid a dirty look and they generally hush for a few minutes.  Adults just get louder.

After some searching, I finally found the movie…on the $7.50 rack!  OH NOES!  Now I have to come up with another gift to meet the $20 mark.  *sigh*  Why couldn’t it be a new release?!?!

Not knowing what else to get, I headed for cosmetics to pick up a few odd and end stocking stuffers I had left to get.  After dodging the old people and getting hit by some guy that was yelling at his kids, I heard some boys singing the oompa-loompa song and turned in time to see the object of their teasing headed toward grocery and realized I needed to go there also.

I find the items I needed and realized thirty minutes had passed.  I headed for the check out line where I watched a commercial showing all of WM’s lanes being open for Christmas.  What a joke.  I watched that commercial no less than four times while my half hour venture turned into an hour venture.

There was a cute little girl in front of me.  Her father gave her a grape to eat.  We soon learned she doesn’t like grapes.  She sucked all the juice out and spit the grape in the floor.  To keep her happy while waiting, he continued feeding her grapes….and she continued spitting them out.  As their grape bill decreased and the janitor’s work increased, my tolerence decreased….and suddenly I realized I was giving the little girl a sour look.  I tried to smile and change the mood, but too late.  She was staring me down.

As luck would have it, a customer service manager came by just as I got to the front of the line, “I need to check your register to see how much change you have.”  *sigh*  Another wait.  Finally, he began checking my items.  Three loaves of bread, two movies, and one of everything else….only I should have had two loaves of bread and one movie.  After arguing with him regarding how many times the machine beeped vs how many movies were ringing up, he finally looked at the slip and realized I was right.  Where was the CSM when I needed him? =(

Finally I was out in the parking lot thinking I was home free, but I was wrong again.  I lost my car.  Eventually I found it and realized my quick trip to WM took over 3 hours (including travel time).  =/  I hate shopping.

The ex said the kids wanted to come spend the week with me for Christmas.  I texted TBF telling him and saying I was afraid they may not want to follow my rules or might fight or…or…or…  (You know.  My typicaly worrying.)

Later on that day I got this text out of the blue, “Lol I am laughing at myself…for some reason having all of your kids over for the holidays sounds like fun.  I think I would really enjoy them over.  I hate to admit it but I miss Vanessa and I would like to get to hang out with Rebecca again… I know.  I must be stupid or strange or something.”

Schmooage doesn’t get much better than that - mainly because I know he meant it.  He is stupid or strange or something because he does enjoy doing family things.

TBF told me he thought I’d like this movie so Wednesday on his way home from work, he stopped and bought it.  We stayed up until 1AM watching it and he was right.  I LOVED the movie!  The faun was a little scary.  The medical scenes were horribly painful.  The story was great.  I just completely loved this movie!

This past weekend, my sister and I went Christmas shopping and bought stuff to make candies.  When we got back to her place, her daughter came running down stairs…and my daughter was following her.  Vanessa had called my niece and asked her to pick her up from a friends house so that she could surprise me.  She helped us make candy and spent the rest of the weekend with us.

Sunday, TBF called me on his way home from work, “Let’s go to the movies before taking Vanessa home.”  So we did.  While watching the previews before the movie started, he leaned over and whispered, “It’s nice having her back, isn’t it?”

The movie was good.  Not super great or anything - afterall, it did star Ted Logan…er I mean Keanu Reeves.  He’s not the best actor.  There were other issues I had with the movie, but overall, it was entertaining and thought provoking in that green “It’s not your planet” kind of way. 

It really was a good night though.  I had my family back even if it was just for a couple of nights.  The next day at work, I got a text message from Vanessa that said, “I love you”.  It was spelled correctly (not I luv u) and I felt she meant it.  It reaffirmed what I already believed:  we’ll work things out.  It’ll just take some time.

TBF comes back to work after a break and says, “Something I never thought would happen just did.”  We were all like, “Huh?”  “I was just asked to be a stripper - and they weren’t kidding.” 

Not only did the woman ask him that, she also came back to the pharmacy to ask in front of all of us and to continue on “If you’re too shy, you don’t have to strip down to nothing.  You can leave your boxers on; although it’d be nice if you didn’t.  The girl getting married works at a liquor store and so do several of her friends so we’ll have plenty of alcohol.  What kind do you want?  We’ll get you all liquored up and then it’s show time!  There’ll be like 20 women there all with money.  I’ll have $30 myself.”

He told me later, “Get me liquored up?!?!  Doesn’t she realize I’m a guy and we invented that ploy of getting them drunk and then taking advantage of them?!?”

I was dying laughing and threw him under the bus, “You should do that.  You can get me a good Christmas present!  If you do that once a week, we could get a new computer, a blue ray player, a big screen tv….”  He was NOT happy with my response…lol  Little did he know that my thought was also, “He would never do that.  If he does though, he’s so gone…and those women.  I’d have to kill them all!”

I’m such a bad girlfriend.  My response is always to tell him to go for it.  A girly at school brought him chocolate chip cookies and a cashier at work kept sending people over with her number to give him.  Both times I told him to go for it.  It’s my gut reaction to make sure he knows he has the freedom to leave if something better comes along.  Of course I’m also pouting not wanting him to take them up on their offers and realizing that he’s likely to if I keep pushing him to, but I can’t help it.  =/  I don’t make him cookies and I’m not some cute 20 something.  I’m old and fat with three drama filled children.  Why he continues to stay with me is beyond me…but he does and I’m glad he does.  Other women can just keep wanting him.  I’ll take it as a compliment that they think I have good taste in men…and try not to harrass him too much about it.

Saturday was TBF’s birthday.  He’s now the ripe old age of 22.  I got him a shirt and the monopoly game for the computer which I gave to him at midnight the night before (morning of) his birthday.  We went to his parents house after work where they had Spring Creek Barbeque waiting.  Ethan was not happy about having barbeque until I explained that the sauce is on the side and you have a platter of many different meats to choose from.  His dad served home made banana splits for dessert.  You’d have thought it was Ethan’s birthday… a plate of beef and then ice cream and bananas.  All his favorites. 

TBF got the ipod touch from his family.  He was thrilled.  He’d asked for the docking station because he was going to buy it for himself with his Christmas bonus.  It’s really pretty neat.  He’s done nothing but watch Youtube, DL aps, and play music.  He said, “This is great!  Now while I’m laying in bed playing on my laptop, you can surf the net beside me rather than having to go to the den.”  He even downloaded Word Twist for me to play. =)

I’ve been meaning to post about Thanksgiving, but I’ve just been lazy I guess.  I’d love to say too much has been going on, but that’s not really true.  Yes I’ve been working a lot, but the truth is I’ve gotten out of the blogging habit and have to get myself back in the grove.

For Thanksgiving, we went to TBF’s parent’s.  I was a bit nervous, but it went well.  They have a big screen tv and a T1 internet connection.  TBF, Ethan, and TBF’s brother each brought their XBox 360.  They scrounged up two more tv’s and played Gears of War 2 and Halo online.  I’d asked Ethan if he was nervous about going over there and he said yes.  He said that there were no kids so he wasn’t sure who he’d talk to.  I asked again afterwards and he said it wasn’t nearly as bad as he thought.  He had fun. =)

TBF’s mom went out of her way to try to make me a bit more comfortable.  She told me a story about the first time she met her husband’s family.  He left her alone with them and she didn’t say a word except yes or no…lol  His whole family was so nice.  They all hugged me and Ethan.  They were laughing, playing, and getting alone so well together.  It was almost like stepping into a Normal Rockwell painting…lol  They’re so openly affectionate and loving.  It was nice to be a part of that.

We left there and went straight to my mom’s house.  On the way, I told him, “Don’t expect my family to hug you because it won’t happen…lol”  TBF said, “I’m going to walk into the house and say, “Where’s my hug?  I want a hug!”  You’re mom will give me one.  She likes me!”  The bad part is, he’s right.  If he asked like that, she would and she’d love it, but she wouldn’t initiate it.

We walked in and everyone was still sitting around the table.  Vanessa was there.  As I walked past her, I tugged on her hair.  I smiled at her, but all I got was a dirty look in return.  I sat down by her a bit later because it was the only open seat.  She got up and left the table for a while, but eventually came back.  By the end of the night, we were actually speaking to each other.  Not like old times, but it was a step in the right direction.  I’ve just made up my mind to think of it as if she’s gone out into the world on her own a little early.  Instead of going away to college, she’s gone away for her senior year.  Eventually we’ll work things out.  There will never be an apology from her.  She’s too stubborn for that.  She comes by it honestly; it was past down from her mother, her mother’s mother, and her mother’s mother’s mother before that.  We’ll eventually get back to a good place though.

All in all, it was a good Thanksgiving.  There wasn’t any real drama or great fun stories to tell.  Just one of those days that left you with a smile on your face and a happy feeling in your heart.  TBF was happy that we were there with his family, I was happy that Vanessa and I seemed to move a step in the right direction, and Ethan was unhappy that he had to leave the T1 connection behind.  Oh well, two out of three isn’t so bad.  ;)